Don’t Make Me Hold Your Baby

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Don’t Do It!

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Credits

Cast

Gary – Mike Trapp
Mom – D’Arcy Carden
Dad – Adam Conover
Jessica – Emily Axford
Ricky – Marshall Givens
Baby – Wyatt Salinas
Maverick Salinas

Crew

Director – Matthew Pollock
Writer – Mike Trapp
Producer – Jon Wolf
Cinematography – Elie Smolkin
Editor – Kent Kincannon
President of Original Content – Sam Reich
VP of Production / Executive Producer – Spencer Griffin
Director of Production – Sam Sparks
Director of Post Production – Michael Schaubach
Production Manager – Sam Kirkpatrick
Casting Director – Chrissy Fiorilli-Ellington
Art Director – Caitlin Williams
Hair and Makeup – Kathleen Pardo
Production Coordinator – Michele Santoro
Sound Mixer – Brad Harding
Visual Effects – Gloo Studio
1st Assistant Camera – Ryan Hogue
2nd Assistant Camera – Chase Azimi
Gaffer – Dustin Gardner
Key Grip – Donato Bragagnolo
Swing – Johnny Silvis
Post Production Supervisor – Evan Watkins
Post Production Coordinator – Andrew Mallonee
Head Assistant Editor – Phil Fox
Production Legal – Karen Segall
Production Accountant – Christine Rodriguez
Assistant Production Accountant – Shay Parsons
Second Assistant Production Accountant – Rebecca Call
Set Teacher – Joelle Bruce
Intern – Michael Sneeden

Comments

Checkername1 | Closed says:

1. EXACTLY ME.
2. WTF DID I WATCH AT THE END?
3. WHY AM I WRITING IN CAPS???

Yyyyzyyy says:

I hate how parents are always raving about their newborn babies, how cute
they are. No they’re not. They look like potatoes.

Surfing Pikachu says:

Am I the only one who’s the weird one in the family for not wanting to hold
or entertain the baby? Give me a kitten and I will love it to death but
Babies are just gross…

upayjay1 says:

“Kids are like farts. You don’t mind your own, but other peoples are
terrible”

selthroWs says:

Luckily no one ever offers me to hold a baby. If they did, I am afraid I
would somehow manage to power bomb it into the ground and elbow drop it’s
face.

K.E.V.MusicAndMore says:

I hold babies everyday… when I cradle my nutsack.

KhaleesiIstheMotherofMyDragon says:

I’d rather hold on to a ticking time bomb than a baby. They are just so
creepy lookin. Why people find those things cute I’ll never know.

Natascha Ruslan says:

I hate babies not because they destroy the rest of your life
just because most of them come out as ungrateful shitheads 

Astronautical Films says:

“YOU SPENT NINE MONTHS MAKING A MIRACLE AND IM GOING TO FUCK IT UP ANY
SECOND

TheyCallMeGawd says:

Treat babies like dishes, drop a few on the floor and people stop asking
you to hold them.

Bentley says:

I LITERALLY DIED

Savannah Rae says:

When I first watched the video I was like everyone was gonna say OMG SO
FUNNY or something like that but instead everyone is like first comment or
38th view PEOPLE THESE DAYS

TheJoshsplosh says:

This was uploaded on my birthday!

Something_to_appease_Google says:

After watching this video I have come to the realisation that College Humor
opposes abortion and strongly opposes feminazism. The phrase “you spent 9
months creating a *miracle* ” proves my claim is correct. I applaud you
College Humor for opposing abortion and feminazism. We all know that it is
a practise that exists as a ritual to join the feminazi group. Only
feminazis and fools associated with them can call human babies and foetuses
“parasites”. Anything that infuriates feminazis is most likely good. Only
insane women (feminazis) find committing manslaughter against defenceless
forming humans to be acceptable. What good is a mother who doesn’t have the
instinct to protect her children? I suppose if the woman having an abortion
doesn’t want to be a mother then she may not be insane but then I question
why she doesn’t have tubal ligation. Then again, babies and humans are
nothing more than lumps of hydrogen, oxygen, carbon, and other trace
elements so abortion and manslaughter in general isn’t necessarily evil. 

shayden998 says:

So….. if the baby was perfectly fine till the second guy took it why did
they blame the first guy?……. I mean I get it’s a joke but just doesn’t
seem to make sense if I were them I’d blame the guy that was currently
holding it.

Jakob Jakobson says:

Dont even bother trying to insult me, I know very well that a lot of people
will be angered by my opinion. Now that we got that out of the way, babies
are not cute at all. They’re annoying and filthy in my opinion. If someone
tried to give their baby to me and wanted me to hold it, I’d simply walk
away.

Morgan Sun says:

Dear the internet:
FOR THE SAKE OF FLYING BABOONS EATING BACON, IT’S JUST A COMEDY VIDEO!
WHERE DID FEMINISM COME INTO THIS?
Thank you.

Brendan O'Neill says:

That guy has the most punchable face I’ve ever seen.

Jacob Phil-Ebosie says:

Too many idiots in the comments for this.

Soma Cruz says:

As a misanthropist I find the baby praising disgusting “9 months making a
miracle”, “most valuable fragile thing you can have”, gtfo.

VideoGamePro says:

No offense to anyone who has kids but i’m going to be honest i dislike
kids, they are annoying many people may say that i’m just exaggerating and
that i’m gonna have kids in the future but let’s be honest, kids today are
different in today’s time and i can give you a shitload of reasons why
having a kid is a pain in ass not saying people can’t have kids but you
need to have a lot of patience’s and time to have a kid and believe me, i
used to raise kids when i was a teen but believe me if you don’t got the
balls or the time don’t do it.

Elisa Pau says:

I thought I was the only one to fear keep in arm babies

CaptainPeelz says:

Do not read the comments or your brain will explode from overexposure to
stupidity

Bazinga Jaffa says:

Darude-Sandstorm

Kiltynachess says:

Fuck babies.

Rekk says:

Hahaha finally a comment section I can relate to. I do my best to distance
myself from children but they always seem to gravitate towards me -.-

ɢᴀᴍᴇʀ Z says:

It seems like everyone either hates or loves babies. They’re BABIES. How is
that controversial? We were all babies at one point.

Alex Houston says:

He’s worried about breaking it, I’m more worried about the fact I’d even
have to touch it. 

sguigly says:

first time i held baby i was 10 and given no direction just support the
head… so i did and found the soft spot and i started poking it because no
one told me not to ( i mean i was supporting the head…) i got bored with
it gave it back asked why the head was so squishy got the death glare…
baby started crying. Moral of the story babies are really boring and so
feeble why would i waste my time on them eventually they’ll be interesting
but most will stay boring so i reiterate no point unless your a
sadist/mashonist (I’m not looking up what these words mean) who enjoys the
routine destruction of poon world wide

AHMAD UCHIHA says:

دارود – عاصفة الرمل 

James Chaffee says:

just watching this video stressed me out

Corruptedmilk says:

Well, that was the last thing I expected.

Da Gray Wolf says:

I’m always a little freaked out when I hold a baby. I just have that
thought of… What if I drop him or her and then I become the reason why
the kid has brain damage. The kid would be walking around and saying.. I
would’ve been able to go to college if I wasn’t dropped as a baby.

AllStarBacon says:

Anal❤️

Sam Lauer says:

*can someone help me? my new phone types everything in bold.*

DaaaahWhoosh says:

Babies are fine. But anyone between the ages of two and 16 I just can’t
handle. 

TheSwamper says:

I never want to hold a baby either. It’s not dislike them, I just feel
incredibly uncomfortable around them. Once the kids get to an age where I
can have a conversation with them, then I’m fine. Before that, they just
kinda weird me out.

sguigly says:

not big fan of babies either why would i want to see one? I don’t gain
enjoyment from it and the baby is not going to remember so I’m ok cousin
whatever illl wait until the kids at least 18-20 before i introduce myself 

m4rx05 says:

Wow, that acting was better than I’d expected. Great sketch too!

TMIbro says:

SOMEONE GET ME A GLASS OF WATER, I’M DYING OF…

FIRST

Alexi123skate says:

when you hold a baby, you hold the FUTURE

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